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Genecia Alluora: This episode is brought to you by Instantpodcastleader.com, the leading platform to launch your podcast in 48 hours and make it profitable. Get your free audiobook and free web class at instantpodcastleader.com/webclass. I believe we can change the world. But first we've got to stop living in fear of being judged for who we are.

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Genecia Alluora: Hi, I'm Genecia Alluora, founder of the number one leading female entrepreneur network in Southeast Asia, supporting 1 million women to own and love the F word. Being fabulous, having freedom, financial independence and family. With a challenge to women everywhere to stop talking themselves out of their dreams. Soul why - Secrets of the Soul Rich Women's blueprint identifies the excuses to let go of the behaviors to adopt and the skills acquire on the path to growth, confidence and believing in yourself to be recognized as a leader online, with clients online, and to have more impact on the world. Stop believing the lies about who you.

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Genecia Alluora: So you can become who you are meant to be. You are just an F word away from the life you want. The marriage you want, the family that you want is going to be fueled by the business and life you build. Join me. Be a soul rich woman. Alone, we are strong. Together we are unstoppable. Welcome to the show.

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Genecia Alluora: Hey, gorgeous, I'm back. I'm Genecia Alluora and today's topic is all about forgiveness, the one exercise that can change everything in your life. Now, holding on resentment is like drinking poison and hoping other person will die. Now, let's face it, many of us have issues from our past that hold us back and cloud the enjoyment of our present, whether it's your not very good childhood, a terrible past relationship, a psycho ex-partner, painful memories of school bullies, or some other story, holding on resentment affects you in countless ways. It can kill your enjoyment of life, affect current relationships, or hold you back from experiencing love. It can even live in your body and cause illness. Years ago, I was living in a constant state of blame and resentment. I was angry with my parents. I was incredibly angry with an ex-boyfriend who did me wrong.

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Genecia Alluora: I was embarrassed and ashamed of my past mistakes. And I carried all of those emotions around with me. I was consumed on how I had been wronged, how I started working when I was 14 years old, why I couldn't enjoy my life, why I couldn't do the things I want, and I just couldn't forgive. I would stay awake all night counting and thinking about conversation again and again like a broken record from over 10 years before and just feel like as though as fresh in my mind, just like the first time. I did try many things. I listened to Louis Hay, I looked at Debbie Ford, the shadow effect, I looked at so many things. I tried counseling, therapy, coaching books, personal development courses. I was still angry all the time. But today, not anymore. The secret of releasing yourself is so simple and profound. It's hard to really say how much it has changed my life, but I believe that this one mantra that I personally use can set you free more than anything else.

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Genecia Alluora: I love myself and I set myself free. This is my time. I'm ready for the next step. Alternatively, you could say, I forgive you, I'm sorry, I love you. This forgiveness exercise will clear 80 to 90 % of your stuff, guaranteed. Well, don't believe me? Well, you just have to try it because all of my coaching clients try it and get amazing results every single time. Like what? For example, a feeling of calm and peace about past events, the ability to get along with family members with no resentment, a lot more self love and self acceptance, a feeling that the world is a safe place, better sleep, less irrational worry, and obsession about the past. Wouldn't you say it's worth giving it a try? To be able to move forward with your life, consciously manifest your dreams and create guilt free success.

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Genecia Alluora: You must have a strong foundation. And part of that is mentally and emotionally decluttering your life. The beauty of this exercise is that you don't have to be physically connected with the person. You don't have to call them or talk to them and say, Hey, I forgive you. You know what? This exercise is not for them. It's about releasing yourself from the shackles that you have been locking yourself up in that prison that you have long kept there. But you know what? Here's a common excuse. You will say, But I just want them to acknowledge what they did to me was wrong. You see, girl, forgiveness doesn't mean you excuse or condone their behavior. Chances are you will never get acknowledgement or the apology you crave. The only thing that you have control over is how you feel about the experience. You know what? You're still drinking the poison and hoping the other person will die, but they have already moved on with their life.

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Genecia Alluora: But Genecia, this, what thing that they did to me was really, really, really, really, really bad. I cannot forgive them and I could not forgive that. But you know what, my dear, some things are just unforgivable. Even so, if you have been to therapy or counseling and you still can't let it go, try and send forgiveness to the situation by doing this exercise. I've heard incredible stories of victims forgiving people who raped or maimed them, family members forgiving drunk drivers who killed their children, and other unforgivable crimes. Some of these amazing stories, I read them on Oprah.Com, and it will astound you and crack open your heart. Now, I really want to tell you that ready to make an experience this transformation begins with recognizing and being aware that you are willing to change.

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Genecia Alluora: So number one, make a list, get a journal and make a physical list of every single thing that has been done to you that you cannot forgive, things that you are holding on and that situations that have been played in your mind for years like a broken record. It can be big or small, specific or general. I would say start with your parents, and that's always a fertile ground for material. Think about your life chronologically and work through your way through any traumatic events, childhood hurts, mistakes by your family, and embarrassments that have created a negative charge for you. For example, just write this down. Take a piece of paper and a pen, or just listen to this. Write this down. When mom did this, the time when you don't have to write an essay about each one.

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Genecia Alluora: Once you've written down everything, obviously, think about every relationship problem you've ever had, the mean employers and bosses who have criticized you, made you feel bad or made you cry. Friends who were nasty or bitchy to you, strangers who made you feel bad by making a horrible comment. Keyboard warriors who say nasty things on you on social media, or even a teacher who embarrassed you. Write it all down. Lastly, it's time to make a list of the things to forgive yourself for. This is a really important list because you'll be surprised how much you are beating yourself up for past mistakes. A really small and stupid error you made 5, 10, or even 20 years ago could be holding you back from going out of your comfort zone today to own and love the F word. Being fabulous, having freedom, financial independence, and a happy family.

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Genecia Alluora: Here are some examples to get you started. You failed something really important. You had been bullied in school, or you mean girl someone at school and it still haunts you. You stole something from somebody and it still repeats in your mind. The time that you dumped someone, you break up in a really nice and yet horrible way, gossiping or bitching behind someone else's back. Or when you made someone cry, whether unintentionally or not. You accidentally hurt an animal or had an accident. You cheated on a test and you did something horrible to your own family member. Well, I just want to say this, nobody is 100% perfect. And even if you think you're the only one person who's made these mistakes, you could be making it mean? I'm not a worthy person. I don't deserve nice things to happen to me. I'm a failure. Do you really want to hang on to that anymore?

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Genecia Alluora: Number two, the simple process. Now I want you to mentally affirm to the person or situation, I forgive you, I'm sorry and I love you. That's it. You can spend a couple of seconds on each one and then move on. Don't get caught up in the emotion. You are the only one saying the mantra and releasing the memory, releasing the energy, releasing that part of you that you hold on to that's toxic to your body. You may feel an overwhelming pouring, outpouring of sadness. You may cry. But you know what, my dear, I'm with you. Just continue with the mantra. I forgive you, evaporates the energy of resentment when you hold towards them. I'm sorry, allows you to feel compassion for their side of the story. I love you, balances the energy, sends love to the situation, and releases you from being the victim. Allow emotions to bubble up and tears to flow, but keep going until you've exhausted the list and yourself. Afterwards, drink a lot of water and rest.

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Genecia Alluora: Number three, check back. Now give it a few days and check in with your list to see if there's any charge remaining. You'll be surprised to find that you can't even recall certain stories. And if you do, there won't be any more trace of embarrassment or anger. And then watch what happens next. Things will shift in your real world. You will feel happier and lighter. Don't be surprised if you get a call out out of the blue from someone you have forgiven. They will experience the benefits too. They might feel lighter or more loving towards you. You won't be seeing that person or situation through a distorted filter anymore. You'll be free of the chains and open to new possibilities for your relationship. You may never even think of them again, which can be a blessing. You have also given yourself a great freedom. It's such a beautiful gift.

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Genecia Alluora: Freedom. Imagine that, my dear. Now, if you are really on a role and you get addicted to forgiveness, well, you can continue this experience. For example, forgive money for abandoning you. Forgive your bank for raising the rates. Forgive the bank for making you bankrupt. Forgive the credit card bills that made and gave you debts and all the interest. Forgive your thighs and your bum bum for holding on to the fat. Forgive your car for breaking down. Forgive the government for their failings. Well, forgive your cat for peeing on your bed. There is no end to forgiveness. Everything that you can think of, we can forgive. And after you get the really traumatic events out of the way, it's really fun and free. I know this simple forgiveness exercise can transform your life. If you do nothing else. Go away and try this exercise before you feel skeptical.

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Genecia Alluora: And I forgive you for your skepticism. I assure you it will work for you. Well, unless you're some weird person, I believe it will work for you, as it has helped thousands and thousands of my mentoring clients, my coaching clients, to transform theirs. Really? After you are done, come back and tell me in the comments what has opened up for you. Connect with me on Facebook, LinkedIn or Instagram. Remember this I forgive you. I'm sorry and I love you.

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Genecia Alluora: The key to unlock consistent success. The key to unlock that diamond within you. No other things involved. This is what you need to do and must do tonight. You can do it because I've done it. As long as you have a mentor who can take you from where you are now to where you want to be, you can shortcut your success. You can be different in order to make a difference. Turn your talent into your business. Turn your passion into a paycheck by being you, by being you and owning you. Give yourself a second chance. Never say no to your failures. As a woman, we have the power in our hands. Never let your fears hold you back. Quit thinking and start doing. Life is really short and keep pursuing what you truly ever wanted to achieve. Women come together. Alone, we are strong. Together, we are unstoppable. The Soul Rich Woman Blueprint is going to be transforming your life today, yesterday, last year. Because you took action today, I'm going to say more power to you.